Manipulative people make us crazy. Therefore, our job is to remain on guard. Manipulators work to appeal to our desire to help and our need to be liked. This is how we can become their slaves — when in reality, we are actually doing more to help them than they are doing for themselves.

Here are some tips on avoiding the manipulator trap:

  1. Distance yourself.
  2. Ignore the manipulator when he tries to re-engage your assistance.
  3. Put up some strong boundaries, such as a decision not to loan that person money or not to give him a ride home or not to do whatever he is asking you to do — no matter how small it is. The manipulator’s goal is always to re-engage your help.

If you:

1) distance yourself,

2) refuse to re-engage, and

3) put up strong boundaries by exercising your “no” muscle,

the manipulator will eventually give up and find another person to help him carry on with his dysfunctional way of living.